March 2012
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zoeythekat replied to your post: Hey, you ass...
Right? I’m thinking it’s something along the lines of, “Hey, you, stop posting so many political pictures mocking Rick Santorum being afraid of vaginas! What you need is some obscure pop punk and angry straight-edge hardcore. Yeah. That’s it.”
Maybe I just need more cats.
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Hey, you ass faces, stop being all ass-facey and...
I like my imaginary computer friends :(
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You see a bug in your room....
totally-relatable:
You are determined to kill it
and then you find out it flies
(via Totally-Relatable: The funniest relatable posts.)
hahahaha oh man, yes to everything.
“You’re always haunted by the idea you’re wasting your life.”
– Chuck Palahniuk (via thelasthingyouforget)
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Horribly sick and dying on St. Patty's day.
But the boyfriend made me breakfast, and let me sleep on his couch all day, and even put on Harry Potter for me, which I subconsciously heard in my sick sleepy stupor and had a high-on-cold-medicine dream about.
Now I’m going to go out and ignore that I feel like death some more by watching the Muppets at midnight with my best friend and my best/only boyfriend in the whole world.
I might...
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“Being tender and open is beautiful. As a woman, I feel continually shhh’ed. Too...”
– Zooey Deschanel (via sugar-and-heartbreak)
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Holy. Fucking. Walking. Dead.
Like…what?
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Best. Ever.
Woman: Can I have birth control?
Government: Do you have a penis?
Woman: No
Government: No, you can't have birth control.
Woman: I got pregnant because I didn't have birth control and I don't want a baby. Can I choose to have an abortion?
Government: No.
Woman: I gave birth to my child but since I wasn't expecting it, I can't afford daycare. Can I have help paying for it?
Government: No.
Woman: Well, why can't I have birth control?
Government: Because. Sex isn't for recreation.
Woman: It can help regulate my period and benefit me in other ways.
Government: Too bad.
Man: For no reason other than for recreational sex, may I have birth control?
Government: Do you have a penis?
Man: YES, YES I DO!!
Government: WELL HOWDY, VALID CITIZEN. You can buy condoms by the dozens. Here, here's a pack of special condom for "His Pleasure." Oooh, these come in different colours and flavours. Here, try these. They have ribs on them. And this one glows in the dark!! LOL OMG DICK LIGHTSABER!!
Government: But seriously, you're a man. You can do what ever you want.
Woman: But-
Government: Shut up, you sinning, freeloading hussy.
